We're about to get very personal and Catholic up in here today.
I grew up in a very religious household. Church every Sunday morning (and a frantic search for matching socks for everybody right beforehand), regular prayers (including right before bed, thanking God for everything and everyone), memorized verses and sunday school songs, all the VeggieTales VHS... the whole nine yards.
My dearest Eric is Agnostic. I actually met him the month before I finished converting to Catholicism. Our family had gone on a long and very difficult (and sometimes heartbreaking) journey of faith before discovering the Roman Catholic Church, and we've prospered immensely since then. Eric and I discussed faith before marriage (and actually he went through the pre-marital course with me and went for a Catholic wedding with me!), and he ultimately left it up to me regarding how we raise our kids. We've actually managed a respectful mixed-religion marriage. Yay!
Nowadays we pray before bedtime, the boys watch VeggieTales on Youtube, and know some of the stories and songs. I don't always have the inner strength to make it to Mass, but my faith has never wavered.
In the nearly six years we've been together, Eric and I have had plenty of opportunity to strengthen our relationship by weathering storms and struggles. All of our children were .01% chance blessings that came at a time when we thought it was crazy, but God said "Y'know what? These Westras would be much happier with this little one." And you can't argue with Him.
Eric thinks we have Bad Luck. I see it as we are super blessed, and God Always Knows. He knows when we need something or when we WILL need something, and gives us the tools and fortitude to get through it.
For example, on our little honeymoon trip, we made it 1.5 hours away before our truck completely broke down in the middle of a busy highway. I managed to get it to the side safely, my aunt and uncle (who lived half an hour away from that spot) picked us up, and we used all the wedding money to pay for the car repairs. We had just enough to completely cover it. God knew.
The month after we got our first joint tax refund, our only car completely broke down. If we hadn't just stocked up our emergency fund, we'd have been SOL. God knew.
When I was a baby, my parents had a point where they had zero money for diapers, two children, and zero food. A knock on the door of their tiny apartment was heard, and they found bags of groceries, diapers, and wipes outside. They knew nobody there, and nobody claimed to have seen the Good Samaritan. They'd told nobody that they needed any of it. Jesus knew.
Eric and I were struggling and had just scraped up enough money to make our rent one month a few years ago. When I got to the bank to pay it, I was informed that our tax refund had gone through early. God knew.
I can't begin to count how many times we've been low on food and my mom or grandma have stopped by out of the blue with lots of it. Diapers and wipes too, when we used disposables. Straight up, Jesus knew.
My sister in law paid for our groceries last month when Eric admitted we were really tight. Jesus knew.
When I was very sick, along with the boys, our washer had stopped working, and poor Eric was running around desperately trying to keep this ship afloat, my parents dropped by with groceries, lots of supplies for a plain diet, and my mom did several loads of our laundry. Jesus knew.
My grandma sent out a repairman as soon as we were better and paid for the new drain motor. "Merry Christmas!"
We have a new front door with a screen door with NO DRAFTS as last year's Christmas present.
Yesterday my sweet husband had to sell a decent chunk of his treasured video game collection in order to get money for the mortgage payment without dipping into our sacred savings. We did it, and used only popular and easily-found-again titles, but he was so sad and my heart hurt. While it was the adult thing to do, adulthood really sucks sometimes.
Today I successfully aced a job interview at Big Box Store, so we have another income to try avoiding these situations and get ourselves in a better spot. When I returned to pick up the kids my parents randomly gifted us enough money to cover at least two other big bills we were stretched thin to make. I thanked them and saved the tears for the drive home.
We aren't perfect. Eric stresses about it and is frustrated because he's almost 30 and we still have these problems, but we have a lot of life changes happening constantly and are still young parents. We're always in a better position than we were the year previous. Keep moving forward. One day we will be able to easily pay all of our bills on time, Eric won't be overworked to the bone, we won't be tempted by savings, we'll get groceries and do repairs around the house without batting an eye, and have lots of nice things. And I'll be the stay-at-home-mom/homemaker I've always dreamed of. Until then, we have to keep doing the best we can with what we've got, and never waver in our faith. I know with a very solid certainty that Someone is always looking out for us.
Jesus always knows.